Telling Your Story

Today would have been my mom’s 64th birthday.

But it’s been almost 7 1/2 years - 2,735 days - 65,647 hours since my mom took her last breath. That’s a long time and yet it feels like yesterday.

When her birthday comes around each year, I’m always faced with a choice. Will I spend the day in sorrow or in joy? While it’s true all that time has passed without her in my life, there were so many more moments that she was apart of.

Those are what I would like to share with you all. I’d like to share a little of my story, but mostly my amazing mother’s story and the beauty that I choose to see instead of the sorrow.

I know many of you would argue that you have the best mom, just like I would argue that I did. We can agree to disagree. My mother was full of love and life. She loved riding horses, dancing, crafting, and spending time with family. My mother, also however was diagnosed with MS when I was 8 years old. That disease limited her ability to do a lot of what “normal” moms could do. I won’t lie and say that I never wished that things were different or that she didn’t struggle with wanting to be well, but she did have a pretty amazing gift to give to me and my sister.

She had the gift of time.

My mother loved to be in the kitchen. My earliest memories of her and I are baking brownies. So much time was spent as a family baking and cooking. When she could no longer do they baking herself she took on the supervising role. My mother was a strict recipe follower, while I was a little more willing to experiment. As you can imagine more than a few heated words were exchanged over the years, but there was always love in the batter.

She took the time, while she was still able, to make Halloween costumes for me and my sister. We certainly didn’t appreciate the effort at the time it took to make them. But being grown, now I know how much she cared to spend days making a costume we would wear for only a few short hours.

She chose to spend so much of her time attending games, concerts, and plays. Always quietly supporting from the stands. She’d tell us how proud she was or how much she enjoyed the show.

And then there were the vacations, the time we spent together as a family. My mother loved the beach and sun. She loved it, her body didn’t, but that didn’t stop us from spending so many summer there. The road trips, the laughter and the yelling, the snacks - some of my best childhood memories.

My mother loved reading (her tastes were questionable - Nicholas Sparks were her favorites). But it was something that we shared. When he 7th and final Harry Potter book came out, I read all 759 pages aloud to her because she wanted to know the ending, but couldn’t do it herself. I think that may be what cemented the series as my favorite of all time.

She and my dad showed me what living your wedding vows really looks like. That the “In sickness and in health” and “ in good times and in bad” are serious statements, and are both hard and beautiful when lived out.

She gave her time freely to watch the Gilmore Girls with me, even though we had seen each episode numerous times. She was always ready to spend time shopping with us and more than happy to tell my father that he was footing the bill.

And there were the quiet times, just the two of us - when words were spoken, sometimes aloud.

My mother couldn’t “do” a lot of things, but she gave generously what she could - her time, her love.

I’ll leave you with one last little bit of hope and love that lived inside my mom. Most people don’t know when their time is ending. They don’t get the chance to say what they feel or impart any final words of wisdom, but my mom did. She was there for my first breath and it was an honor to be there for her last. Here final words were simple ones;

“I love you. Be Brave.”

Her love and her final words of wisdom are what I carry with me each day.

Thank you friends for listening to a little part of my mom’s story. May each of you use your time wisely, may you love freely, and always, always be brave.

Mom - Happy Birthday! One day we’ll all celebrate together again, until then - have an awesome time partying with Jesus.

To Everything There Is A Season…

Kiley Ann